Mountains and Islands

Ron has a new word.  He heard it on CNBC Friday and decided to try it out on me today.  "Oh don't be so pejorative ," he said.  "Here, can you help me with this pejorative project?" And, "I'm feeling a little pejorative.  Can you get me a beer?"  It became clear after he said it about a dozen times that he really didn't know what it meant.  So we looked it up.  It's not an everyday word in everyday America, after all.  Now we know. Friday night we attended a very unique party, thrown by our neighbors, Cam and Elia .  I'm not too sure of the spelling of her name.  Cam is a biology professor at the University of Hawaii at Hilo with a specialty in genetics.  They have two maniacal border collies that bark themselves into a frenzy whenever the poochies and I walk by.  Anyway, every year, Cam invites his graduate students to a bash to kick off the school year.  Neighbors and assorted friends are also invited.  That's where we came in.

They had shaved a small patch of hair from her front leg.  It's where the technicians had inserted her I.V. line.  My sweet Hoppsy had one tooth pulled Monday and the rest of them cleaned.  I hated leaving her there.  I tried to tell her I'd be right back.  It would just be a few hours.  She would be home again that afternoon.  But she didn't understand.  Worse, I dropped her off, but had to work that day so Ron picked her up.  That's always how it goes.  I'm the bad guy, he's the hero.   The good news is that she came through her ordeal just fine and is loving the all-wet food she's been getting.  It's back to the crunchy stuff tomorrow. We have lost yet another employee at the winery.  My friend Mandy is moving on.  Today is her last.  She's worked there for nearly five years and has recently scored a position at Macy's, hocking cosmetics.  It's the perfect job for her.  She's a girly girl who is always put together perfectly.  I will

There are lots of rocks atom Mauna Kea , way up there at 13,796 feet.  There's also a lake very near the summit.  It's called Lake Waiau . (Pronounced wy -ow)  Ancient eruptions from summit cinder cones deposited fine particles that lay like a thin layer of cement in the bottom of a depression, making it leak-proof.  The depression filled first with with glacial ice melt.  Yes, believe it or not, there were glaciers on Mauna Kea 30,000 years ago.  Today, annual snow melt and rainfall keep the lake from going dry. The only things that live in the lake are algae and bacteria, both of which have evolved to generate their own natural protection against solar radiation in order to survive the intensity of the sun's rays at this elevation.  The air is definitely thin up there.  I could feel it before we got out of our vehicles.   Here, you see the Keck telescopes, the twins as they are called, against the perfect blue sky.  When these and the earlier telescopes were built on

OLYMPICS!   Yay !  I love the Olympics.  The opening ceremonies were spectacular and I have high hopes for a peaceful, competitive and entertaining games.   Closer to home, Crawford got a hair cut the other day.  We trimmed her cute ears and snipped away her shaggy butt fur so as to avoid too many cling- ons .  This photo's a little blurry, but isn't she the cutest?   The winery was slow and quiet until the last hour of the day today, when the whole world came in.  Many tasted, some purchased, but few tipped.  What's going on, people?  I teach visitors cool local phrases like okole maluna (bottoms up) and pau hana (happy hour 0r work is finished).  I make jokes about there being no macadamia nuts in the Macadamia Nut Honey Wine because the nuts make the wine too crunchy.  I share the knowledge that our Guava Wine makes the perfect accompaniment to Spam.  People laugh.  They think it's great.  I'm entertaining. I'm funny.  I'm informative.  I tell them t

It's been so nice the last several days that I really have nothing to complain about.  Oh sure, I could probably find plenty to justify a good whine, but I just don't feel like it.  Tonight, Ron brought home some Coronas and after I poured mine into a frosty mug from the freezer, I noticed him trudging into the back yard.  So I shouted for him to please toss me a lime.  He picked one off the tree and underhanded the lovely, tangy green orb right up to me over the railing of the lanai.  Now that's livin '.   Lately, I've taken to singing a little ditty from Uncle Albert (Paul McCartney) to Crawford whenever I take her for a walk in her sling.  She can't hear me, but I sing to her anyway.  Her back legs hang, so I have to be sure to keep them from dragging.  The other day there I was, singing, " Weedle weedle , little Crawford get around (get around), get your feet up off the ground, weedle weedle get around.... "What are you singing?"  Ron asked

Ode to Wild Wilburs Four youngster piggies came into our yard We saw them coming close and we tried real hard To shoo them all away before they did their deed But they toppled coffee trees with tremendous speed With broom in hand, Ron ran, yelled and swung We couldn't bear to shoot them, they were so young They may have been piglets, but their noses dug well enough to do damage, I'm writing here to tell When the pigs get bigger, all bets are off The oinkers will be braver, at us they will scoff  So instead of just a broom, a .22's sting Or a giant metal trap might be just the thing Poor poor piggies, they're just trying to eat Everybody wants them, to smoke their meat A bounty's on their head, they're always on the run When one yard gets to dicey , they find another one Yes, the pigs returned with a vengeance tonight. They did topple one tree and were getting set to do what they do when we spotted them in the twilight.  Scat! Cute little buggahs .  Not for lon

Ah wildlife.  Soaring eagles.  Majestic elk.  Oh wait.  That's the mainland.  This is Hawaii.  So the most prevalent wildlife here is.... Pigs!  Yes, here they are, baby swines - swinettes if you will - scampering through our back 40.  OK, it's our back four.  What's a zero or two among friends?   This little piggy eats worms by toppling over freshly planted coffee seedlings.   This little piggy gobbles strawberry guavas and poops the seeds wherever he goes to spread the invasive trees.   This little piggy roots up the forest, creating holes that fill with water, breading mosquitoes that carry diseases to kill the native bird population.  The thing is, the little piggies really are cute.  They are only trying to survive, after all, just like we are. We brought them here, then released them.  They survived, then thrived and multiplied.  We declared them a nuisance .  How fair is that? Are humans stupid, or what? Today we made a quick trip to town for some light shopping an

We cracked open Ron's birthday present today and christened it with a batch of chicken wings.  It's a fancy shmancy deep fryer with temperature control and a metal basket.  Uptown!  Lucy is now enjoying the box.  Here she is, relaxing.  It's really her house.  We just live here. Today I totally mistook two Kona residents for Punatics .  I could have sworn they were Punatics . I even asked them, "So, are you two visiting from Pahoa ?"  Shoots, cuz .  They looked like 'em. They dressed like 'em.  They smelled like 'em.  It just goes to show you, you can't judge a book by its cover.  It also goes to show you there are pockets of Punatic -like folk all over Hawaii Island.  With the possible exception of Waikaloa , a.k.a Haole -wood.   Here in Hawaii, it's not uncommon to hear cute little ditties on the radio singing about local foods.  There's a very popular song called Fish and Poi, with a chorus that goes like this: I like fish and poi I