Sunday, November 14, 2010

Sunday in the hood

Hope you've all gotten your flu and ammonia shots this season. That's how someone describe their vaccinations to me the other day.  My own, well educated husband used the word, "upsurp" just yesterday, as in, "The upstart could upsurp the reigning power."

"Upsurp is not a word," I said.
"What is it then?" he asked.
"Usurp. The word is usurp."
"Oh, well, whatever," he said.

You say pneumonia and I'll say ammonia. You say upsurp and I'll say usurp. Pneumonia, ammonia, upsurp, usurp. Let's call the whole thing off! 

It was nice just long enough this morning for us to borrow the neighbor's ultra-long ladder and send our  fearless neighbor up to clear out the grass and leaves clogging the gutters. Young Joe trod the roof like a pro, with the balance of an athlete and the belief in immortality and desperation to earn $20 only an 18 year-old possesses. What a nice kid.  

When visiting our neighbor, Leonard, we discovered the ladder being used as a table, ends resting on blocks, plywood planks laid across. 

"We had a garage sale yesterday," Leonard said as he unloaded the ladder of its burden to display what was left, the stuff nobody would buy for fifty cents. 
"How clueless are we?" I said. "We live right across the street and we didn't even know."
"That's OK," he said. "We know you guys are hermits."
"Hey, look at this?" Ron said, pointing to a suitcase with a price marking of a dollar. "We need one of these. It looks like a pretty good one."
"You don't want that," said Leonard, "It's OK, but not suitable for travel."
"A suitcase that's OK, but not suitable for travel? That's hilarious!" I said.  As we schlepped the ladder home, me carrying the front and Ron the tail, I was still giggling about it.        
"That's like saying, 'Sure, it's a great hammer. I just wouldn't pound anything with it if I were you. Or, that's a fine pan, the tool of a gourmet, for sure, so long as you don't cook anything in it." I had him laughing by the time we got home. Sometimes, the fact that little things like this amuse me so much is a friggin' blessed miracle.

Too bad we can't upsurp the raining power.  Ah, whatever. The toads like it.

A hui hou. Aloha!

Monday, November 01, 2010

As promised, a flash in the pancake pan

Here's the link to my flash fiction story, entitled, The Lemming Sisters.  Happy reading!

Oh, and if you like this and want to support this funny little humor ezine, check out their merchandise. The t-shirts are cute!